After The 30 Year Reunion

I was amazed at how well everyone looked! As is my usual motive of operandi, I waited until the last minute to do several things. I waited until 2 weeks before to order the Victoria Principal Secret Complete Vitamins & Skin care set that promised people their skin could look just as youthful as it did the day they turned 20. Which I incidentally cancelled today, they asked why? Well there is more product left in a squeezed out tube of toothpaste then in any of the containers & unfortunately, I only used it about a week, so my skin still looked about 30 give or take 10 years. What can I say? It was 2 in the morning when I sneaked out of my bedroom murmuring the 1 800 number until I could write it & dial it without waking my husband.

In retrospect, I should have used the extra 50 bucks to have my hair done. Which looks exceptionally good today-but looked pretty horrible for the reunion (I always get the most compliments when I wash it at night & let my pillow do the styling-no kidding it looks curlier, fuller & even styled-which was necessitated last night by having one of my patients get sick & heave her stomach contents up splashing all over my arm, I was too tired to blow dry my hair after my shower when I got home from work-who am I kidding, I would have never blow dried my hair before going to bed) but alas, just for the reunion I thought what the heck, maybe this time it will work (even it it never has), & I tried styling it & blow drying it myself which of course it totally looked like it, my hair did not cooperate at all! The funny thing was I didn't notice how frizzy it got until we were leaving from the reunion & I happened to glance at my reflection in a mirror-EGADS! It was frizzy out to "here" {see me holding my hads 18" apart}. But since I was hurrying to meet up with my carpoolers & I did my make up in the car & and did not even think to recheck myself in the ladies room. I was so excited to meet everyone & check out the old photos, displays, etc. I could only comment to my fellow carpoolers AS WE WERE LEAVING, "Well it's obvious I didn't use enough styling product in my hair-it certainly wasn't this frizzy when I left!" To make me feel better one of the fellow carpoolers mumbled something to the effect, maybe in high school he had enough hair to worry about, it getting frizzy without styling product, but certainly not now, after I mentioned it looked like he certainly remembered to use enough styling product.

The other rather obvious thing I procrasted in was trimming down. I can only say I won the verbal award for the "Breeders Cup" by having the most children. Five. Of course I had to take my pre-packed picture of my 5 kids to the other winner who tied me and she had the nerve to admit well, she really only had 2 (or maybe was it 3?) The rest were step kids she was claiming. UNfair! I GAINED PREGNANT WEIGHT 5 TIMES, SHE ONLY DID IT A COUPLE! I totally should have been the SOLE winner. When they called my name, I graciously stood up & took a bow. Besides going to the gym, (which incidentally is where I should be right now, but thought this absolutely had to be posted without further delay-I can always exercise later, right?) I pulled out a pair of Silkies ULTRA Control Top (translated in two other languages Slikies ULTRA FIGUR PERFEKT, & SILIKES ULTRA TOP MINCEUR can all only mean one thing-they help you suck it all in).

Let me tell you about these SILKIES PANTYHOSE. My mother, bless her dear heart (she passed away about 3 years ago) always told us a couple of main things, "Always wear clean underwear in case you are in an accident," and "Stand up straight & hold your stomach in." I'm guessing she never wanted to run out of panty hose as between my 3 siblings & myself, we now each have enough pairs of panty hose to say, outfit an entire drill team, for 3 seasons. Just kidding, but thank you Mom, I will never have to buy another pair of panty hose for a very,very, long time. It was quite fortunate she thought in her infinite wisdom to buy these CONTROL TOP HOSE, because if I had only worn knee high's, I would have never been able to zip up the size 12 pants dress black pants I bought with little shimmery pin-stripes (of course to help with the slimming & making you look taller effect, since I am not even 5 feet tall-that was another thing, a lot of people grew taller, and sadly I did not). And I forgot to mention, I normally wear size 14, but remember I had great hopes of slimming down! I couldn't quite get them to zip without the CONTROL TOP hose on, but once I put them on, WA-LA! They Zipped! So I'm estimating they took a visible inch from in front & from behind. I only wished they could have taken maybe another 2 inches off, perhaps 5 even, yes that would have been good!

Now that I have diverged, let me sum it up, it was lovely to see familiar faces & hear how everyone was doing. It was amazing to think & reflect what I have done with my life these past 30 years-mainly taking care of my 5 children, so what if I was not the same 99 pounds in high school, that my hair was frizzy, my pants too tight, the posed picture they took of me & put in a heart shaped keychain & tried to sell to me for $10 bucks after I already paid $100, looked like the former me with a growth around my neck & face (or like my one friend who came at the last minute even though she didn't loose her 35 pounds either exclaimed she looked like a blown up "basketball")in her heart reunion commemorative key chain, and in my haste in putting on my make-up in the car only put on one of my very long dangly, earrings, I realize I have no illusions. There were a few kind hearted souls that actually complimented me, I think either they were lying through their teeth, or perhaps their forty-something vision was pretty bad, or their lasix doctor didn't do a great job, but no, they were nice guys then and still had kind hearts now. So, after it was all said & done, I came home to my family, snuggled in my husband's arms, reflected on my many blessings and felt at peace. Life is good.